Our Relationships with One Another - Lesson 6

Speak to One Another
  1. INTRODUCTION

    1. In the previous lesson, we considered our responsibility in Christ to build up one another.

      1. The edification of one another should be a goal of Christians (Rom. 14:19).

      2. Edification itself has the goal of causing growth (Eph. 4:11-16).

    2. The last point of that lesson was that our primary tool for building up one another is our speech.

      1. Actions may speak louder than words in many ways, but edification in Christ cannot be accomplished without the use of God's word.

      2. Therefore, it is necessary that we be skillful in the word of God and in our use of it toward one another (2Tim. 2:15; 4:1-5).

    3. In this lesson, we will continue with that theme as we look at the ways we should speak to one another.

       

  2. SPEAK THE TRUTH TO ONE ANOTHER

    1. As Christians, we have an obligation to speak the truth to one another.

      1. As fellow members of the body of Christ, we are bound to one another by our common faith in the truth of the gospel.  Therefore, we must be truthful with one another.

        1. In Ephesians 4:25, the Scripture says, "Therefore, laying aside falsehood, speak truth each one of you with his neighbor, for we are members of one another."

        2. Christians should never lie to anyone, but they have an even deeper commitment to be truthful with one another.  Notice Colossians 3:9, which says, "Do not lie to one another, since you laid aside the old self with its evil practices."

      2. The Lord has mandated that we should speak the truth to one another in part by singing.

        1. In Colossians 3:16, the Scripture says, "Let the word of Christ richly dwell within you, with all wisdom teaching and admonishing one another with psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing with thankfulness in your hearts to God."

        2. Likewise, Ephesians 5:18-19 says,

          18And do not get drunk with wine, for that is dissipation, but be filled with the Spirit, 19speaking to one another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing and making melody with your heart to the Lord...

        3. We sing praises to God, but we also sing and collectively speak to one another.  The substance of our songs toward one another must be from the truth of God's word.

    2. Our words toward one another should have their roots in the word of God.

      1. In terms of preaching and teaching, it is our responsibility to "preach the word; be ready in season and out of season; reprove, rebuke, exhort, with great patience and instruction" (2Tim. 4:2).  God's message is the only message we may preach.

      2. In terms of our conversation with one another, Peter wrote, "Whoever speaks, is to do so as one who is speaking the utterances of God" (1Pet. 4:11).  In context, this passage indicates that God's word is the resource for our speech just as His strength is the resource for our service.

      3. It is not that we are bound to say nothing other than direct quotations from Scripture, but rather it is that all of our words must be governed by God's word.  "Let no unwholesome word proceed from your mouth..." (Eph. 4:29).

    3. Love should always be our motivation for speaking the truth to one another.

      1. According to Ephesians 4:15, we are to be "speaking the truth in love."

        1. The context of this passage describes the growth of the body that is caused by speaking the truth in love.

        2. Genuine love motivates us to speak the "whole purpose of God" (Acts 20:27) without omission. This means that we will speak not only the pleasant truths (exhortation) but also the unpleasant truths (rebuke, reproof) that are necessary for spiritual growth.

      2. It is possible to speak the truth for reasons other than love, but love is motivation assigned by God.

        1. One may speak the truth out of selfishness, envy, malice, or other unloving motivations. In such cases, the words spoken may be true, but they will not be edifying without love, for "knowledge makes arrogant, but love edifies" (1Cor. 8:1).

        2. With love as our motivation and guide, we will deliver our words to one another in such a way that they may be well-received.  Even if the truth is unpleasant, it can be delivered in an acceptable way when it is spoken in love.

  3. PURPOSES OF OUR SPEECH TOWARD ONE ANOTHER

    1. Scripture gives many reasons for Christians to speak to one another.

      1. As noted before, we are to "reprove, rebuke, and exhort" (2Tim. 4:2).

        1. Reproof is correction. Such correction can be given gently.

        2. Rebuke is severe censure.  This is harsher than reproof.

        3. Exhortation is to come to one's side for help and comfort.

      2. Our words are to be used to admonish one another

        1. An admonition is similar to an exhortation, but it also includes a sense of warning.

        2. Scripture instructs to admonish one another in Colossians 3:16 (see above) and Romans 15:14, which says, "And concerning you, my brethren, I myself also am convinced that you yourselves are full of goodness, filled with all knowledge and able also to admonish one another."

      3. With words, we are to edify one another.

        1. Edification is the work of building up as we saw in the last lesson.

        2. Notice Ephesians 4:29, which says, "Let no unwholesome word proceed from your mouth, but only such a word as is good for edification according to the need of the moment, so that it will give grace to those who hear."

      4. Our words to one another should provide teaching in the word of Christ (Col. 3:16).

      5. Our words can provide comfort to one another such commanded in 1Thessalonians 4:18, which says, "Therefore comfort one another with these words."

      6. As noted before, speaking the truth in love causes growth in the body of Christ.  Consider Ephesians 4:15-16:

        15But speaking the truth in love, we are to grow up in all aspects into Him who is the head, even Christ, 16from whom the whole body, being fitted and held together by what every joint supplies, according to the proper working of each individual part, causes the growth of the body for the building up of itself in love.

      7. Speaking to one another in love also provides encouragement. Consider 1Thessalonians. 5:11, which says, "Therefore encourage one another and build up one another, just as you also are doing."

    2. There are also some purposes that should not be served by our words toward one another.

      1. As we saw earlier, lies and deceit should be put away from every Christian (Eph. 4:25; Col. 3:9).

      2. Gossiping is universally condemned in the Scriptures (Rom. 1:29; 1Tim. 3:11; 5:13; 2Tim. 2:3; Tit. 3:3) and has no place on the lips of Christians.  We should never go about telling stories on one another that are untrue, unkind, or unnecessary.

      3. Among Christians, "there must be no filthiness and silly talk, or coarse jesting, which are not fitting, but rather giving of thanks" (Eph. 5:4).  Suggestive talk and profane language must never be found among God's people.

      4. Words that tear down one another should not be used by Christians, for our words should be "for building up and not for tearing down" (2Cor. 13:10).

      5. We should never curse one another by our words.  James 3:9-10 says,

        9With [the tongue] we bless our Lord and Father, and with it we curse men, who have been made in the likeness of God; 10from the same mouth come both blessing and cursing.  My brethren, these things ought not to be this way.

      6. Slander has no place among Christians, for James 4:11 says, "Do not speak against one another, brethren. He who speaks against a brother or judges his brother, speaks against the law and judges the law; but if you judge the law, you are not a doer of the law but a judge of it."

         

  4. CONCLUSION

    1. It necessary for us to communicate with one another by words.  Therefore, let us be certain that we know how to so according to God's will.

    2. Speaking to one another in the Lord is one of the great blessings of the fellowship of Christ. Our words toward one another can be a source of great strength, encouragement, and comfort, so let us use them well.