What Is In It For Me?

If you are a person who asks what is in a marriage for me as an individual, then none of the items that follow will be meaningful to you. This question already indicates that you are self-centered and marriage is not for you. Anyone in a successful marriage can tell you that it involves a joint relationship for better or for worse.

Marriage is for companionship and serves as the foundation of any society. In Genesis 2:18-24, God observed that it was not good that man should be alone and determined to make him a help meet. God made woman and brought her to man. Therefore, marriage is about a man and a woman coming together and becoming one flesh. In that partnership they are joined together by God as Jesus tells us in Matthew 19:6. This is a relationship that is defined by God and not man. Paul details the husband and wife relationship in Ephesians 5:22-33. It is a relationship that involves sacrificing on both individual's part. A close reading of these verses show a relationship of giving and not taking, of trust, and patience towards one another.

Another benefit of marriage is that it is the only relationship that exists where sexual relationships can be experienced with the approval of God. In 1 Corinthians 7:2, Paul states, "Nevertheless, to avoid fornication, let every man have his own wife, and let every woman have her own husband." Later in verse 9 he states, "But if they cannot contain, let them marry: for it is better to marry than to burn." Make no mistake about it, as Paul stated in 1 Corinthians 6:9-10 that neither fornicators nor adulterers shall inherit the kingdom of God. Also, note that God defines marriage and not man since He established that institution.

Finally, as noted in Genesis 1:27-28, marriage is for procreation. This speaks to the future of a society. There is no better environment for children to be raised than in a relationship that incorporates a husband and wife relating to each other as described in the Bible. A society that turns its back on the family and fails to emphasize its importance is a society that is doomed to collapse.

As you can see from the above, marriage is not for those who are driven by the principal of "What is in it for me?" because, marriage is not about me, but about us.

Charles Royal, Decatur AL